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OK, here's a couple....
"Outside a dog a book is a man's best friend. Inside a dog it's too dark to read." - Groucho Marx
The Three Stooges on a fishing trip...
Larry: "You know, fish is great brain food."
Moe: "Then you should fish for a whale." |
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Ok I've got one 
"Having sex is like playing bridge. If you don't have a good partner, you'd
better have a good hand." Woody Allen 
HAPPY BIRTHDAY AUGGIE!! |
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Happy Birthday Auggie
"Bisexuality immediately doubles your chances for a date on Saturday night."
Rodney Dangerfield
But you already knew that  |
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“Sex at age 90 is like trying to shoot pool with a rope.”
Camille Paglia
So I hope when you're 90 you can at least say you can measure it in twains! 
Happy birthday, Auggie!!! |
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Happy Birthday Auggie,,,, no birthday one liners would be complete without some cooperisms!!!
I bought some HP sauce the other day. It's costing me 6p a month for the next 2 years
My friend drowned in a bowl of muesli. A strong currant pulled him
in.
I'm on a whiskey diet. I've lost three days already
I went to the doctors the other day and I said, 'have you got anything for wind'? so he gave me a kite.
I went to a seafood disco last week...and pulled a muscle. |
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